It seems that after anti-gay crusader Ashburn was busted for DUI at a gay bar, he just couldn't think of a good explanation.

Oh, Roy, Roy, Roy...! Did you learn nothing from Larry Craig and Ted Haggard?  Deny, deny, deny, that's the ticket!

If only Roy had waited for the advice I posted here this very morning!  Why, there's a hundred reasonable explanations for a pol who opposes gay marriage ending up at a gay bar.  (Would you believe, a Dozen?)

Now that Ashburn has shown the way, maybe other religious conservatives will ditch their repressed, joyless, dishonest lives.

Maybe this will begin a Republican Renaissance of honesty and tolerance!

....Naah.  Just kidding.  Ashburn vows he'll keep on voting like a bigot.

Personally, I think the G.O.P.'s attack on gay civil rights is actually their cynical, brilliant move to prevent marriage from taking all those cute guys down at the Boom Boom Room out of circulation.  Let's face it -- widespread gay marriage would be a disaster for these pols, leaving them with nothing but a bunch of their hideous Republican closetmates to hit on.  

Brrr.

The only prospect that could be more horrifying to them is affordable health care for all.